I lived next to a neighbor who had a dog that barked all the time. No matter what time of day it was, you could hear it barking, barking, barking. Some of us do exactly as my neighbors dog do, complain, complain, complain. No matter what, a fault will be found even in a simple “Good morning”
Complaining when an injustice has been done is alright, but when you program yourself to find fault or discrepancies in everything and everyone, you are living a life that is miserable because you are never satisfied. Complainers eventually lose friends and family tend to stay away from you because of your ‘Bad Attitude’
Well, today I challenge you to take the 30 Day No Complaining Challenge!
30 Day Complaint Free Experiment
Rev. Will Bowen of One Community Spiritual Center in Kansas challenged his congregation to go 21 days without complaining to help foster a habit of gratitude. He based his challenge in research suggesting that it takes at least 21 days to form a new habit. His idea took off like a wildfire and he has appeared on Oprah and The Today Show attempting to spread his message of a complaint free world.
We are also attempting to reduce our complaints and to increase our focus on what we are grateful for, what we want and possible solutions.
We disagree with Bowen in that we believe you should be able to disagree with someone or point out something you would like to see change. Constructive criticism is okay as long as you focus primarily on what you want (instead of what you don’t want), what you’re grateful for and brainstorming possible solutions.
For example we wouldn’t consider this a complaint:
My Parmesan Chicken was really good. I didn’t like how long it took to get our food at the restaurant. (so far a possible complaint) I would’ve preferred to be in and out in one hour. I think next time I’ll either let the server know ahead of time if I’m in a hurry or I’ll go somewhere I know it will be faster (focuses on what she wants and what she could possibly do next time).
So the challenge is to go 30 consecutive days without complaining.
Wear a ring, bracelet, rubber band or something on your wrist to remind you of the challenge and your commitment to it.
If you complain, switch the ring or bracelet to your opposite wrist or finger and start over at day 1. Even if it happens on day 25 you start back at day 1.
If you state something you would like to see changed once and with possible solutions it is okay. As long as you’re focused on what your grateful for, what you want and possible solutions you’re going in the right direction.
This is not an easy experiment and could take you a very long time to make it 30 consecutive days. Please don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re most likely trying to change a habit that is deeply ingrained in you.
Inspired by Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael Arn
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